It never gets easier. Every single time is just as terrifying, the same stab in my gut when I realize...I'm venturing away from my home...again! What am I doing to myself?!
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The trip was so far out of my comfort zone, there wasn't a trace of light at the end of the anxiety tunnel as my plane took off. It was the first time I listened to my gut instead of every excuse I could think of, and finally just went for it.
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I awoke on the couch, lights on, movie credits rolling, and terror oozing through me like a dull, fatal agony. Nightmares make heavy appearances in my life, usually for weeks or months at a time, but last night's trumped them all.
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We rarely find ourselves when we are hiding among sunshine-y moments, just-alright days, and sighs of contentment. We find out who we really are during the moments that feel too huge to handle.
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What strikes me as one of the strangest human fears is our terror of the unknown within ourselves.
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